Hope I Live To Tell

www.myspace.com/shaztified - I Live to Tell

Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly

Every little thing that you say or do
I’m hung up
I’m hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I’m fed up
I’m tired of waiting on you

Time goes by so slowly for those who wait
No time to hesitate
Those who run seem to have all the fun
I’m caught up
I don’t know what to do

Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
I don’t know what to do

Every little thing that you say or do
I’m hung up
I’m hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I’m fed up
I’m tired of waiting on you

Every little thing that you say or do
I’m hung up
I’m hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I’m fed up
I’m tired of waiting on you

Ring ring ring goes the telephone
The lights are on but there’s no-one home
Tick tick tock it’s a quarter to two
And I’m done
I’m hanging up on you

I can’t keep on waiting for you
I know that you’re still hesitating
Don’t cry for me
’cause I’ll find my way
you’ll wake up one day
but it’ll be too late

Every little thing that you say or do
I’m hung up
I’m hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I’m fed up
I’m tired of waiting on you

Every little thing that you say or do
I’m hung up
I’m hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I’m fed up
I’m tired of waiting on you

I have lost my illusions - baby I love you!

Current Mood: loved
Current Music: L

'I wish I could be honey-glazed.' - Shaz to Kayleigh.

Characters from Big Brother 2005 and who they correspond to:

Mary - Well, that just has to be me I'm afraid, and such a shame that she bloody left in the first week! Poor cow! I like being a witch.

Craig - Alan!!! Bitchy but too nice to be a complete cow.

Makosi - Beebs.

Kamal - Mercedes (look at my stilettos....)

Derek - Jordan (the Tory-toff)

Maxwell - Dan Jacobs (yob)

Roberto - Shaun, definitely! Sleazy & slimey.

Saskia - Stacccccccccaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy.

Samantha - Holly (evil, malicious bitch)

Science - Tosin

Vanessa - I don't know anybody that boring.

Anthony - Adam Whitnall. (fit but thick).

Lesley - Louise.

Chacun pense à soi
Comme si il n’y avait que ça,
Chacun mène à bien
Que ce qu’il veut bien.

Chacun pense à soi
Comme si il n’y avait que ça,
Chacun mène à bien
Que ce qu’il veut bien. Regardons autour de nous
On vit dans un monde de fous
Chacun cherche sa gloire,
Chacun cherche l’espoir.
On oublie ce qui nous entoure
Ceux qui nous donnent de l’Amour
On chasse de notre mémoire
Ce qui nous empêche d’y croire.
On laisse au bord du chemin.

Les chagrins sans lendemain,
On poursuit chacun sa route.
On laisse au bord de la route
Chacun tous ses petits doutes,
On poursuit son chemin. Chacun pense à soi
Comme si il n’y avait que ça,
Chacun mène à bien
Que ce qu’il veut bien.
Chacun pense à soi
Comme si il n’y avait que ça,
Chacun mène à bien
Que ce qu’il veut bien.

Tenir au creux de ses mains
Les clefs de notre destin,
Mener à la victoire
Tous nos rêves d’un soir.
Et on court après le temps
On passe à côté des gens,
On court après l’argent,
On se cache, on se ment.
Même si la solitude
Est notre seule attitude,
On garde en chacun de nous
L’Amour de ceux qui nous aime,
Même si on a de la peine,
On se retrouvera.
Même si la réalité
N’est pas notre vérité,
On continue à y croire
A se battre pour notre histoire.
Même si le prix à payer
Est plus cher à chaque fois,
On continue à y croire
Des espoirs pour nos espoirs.

Chacun pense à soi
Comme si il n’y avait que ça,
Chacun mène à bien
Que ce qu’il veut bien.
Chacun pense à soi
Comme si il n’y avait que ça,
Chacun mène à bien
Que ce qu’il veut bien.

Current Mood: angry

So, I made my dramatic return to Kabbalah yesterday, and tied the ever frustrating red string. I was having some serious doubts about everything for a while, and when things started going ok for a while without Kabbalah, I asked myself - do i need this? So, with a break for a while, I was recently set about thinking about it all again. My brother and sister-in-law are trying for a baby at the moment, and they've spent loads and loads on IVF (link to Chandler and Monica storyline, it's amazingly similar) - but on Wednesday, they found out that it had failed...I felt a little bad, especially as all I could care about was getting a bloomin' car, so although things are going great for me, they're so not so much for others. THUS, I welcome back Kabbalah, and I really do hope that things come together for them soon. As for my mother - not even Kabbalah can help the bitch.

In other news...Shaz and BB are attacked by yoghurt on the Chav01, and get their revenge by throwing water at the 'Chavvy birds' ring leader. Now that's a storyline...

Current Music: Why enter something you aren't even listening to?

ANDY RODDICK

Current Mood: horny

Current Mood: drained

Last Car Ride: My driving lesson last Friday.

Last Kiss: 3 hours ago.
Last Good Cry: Years and years and years ago - I don't do crying.
Last Library Book checked out: 'Saturday' by Ian McEwan - I didn't even read it.

Last Movie Seen in Theatres: Cursed.

Last Book/Play Read: The Accrington Pals.
Last Movie Rented: The Stepford Wives.
Last Cuss Word Uttered: Drunk bitch.

Last Beverage Drank: Water, if that is classed as a beverage.

Last Food Consumed: Muller Corner yoghurt with Strawberry and Orange balls.
Last Crush: Tom Cunt - glad that one's over.

Last Phone Call: My sister.
Last TV Show Watched: BBC1 News.
Last Time Showered: 6.30 this morning.

Last Shoes Worn: Brown Paul Smith loafers.

Last CD Played: Garbage.
Last Item Bought: My tux for the prom!
Last Download: Cry Baby - Eurovision is in the air!

Last Annoyance: Hearing of people voting Conservative because Lib Dem is a wasted vote.

Last Disappointment: Not persuading more people to vote Lib Dem.
Last Thing Written: Thoughts on the election.

Last Key Used: Door key.

Last Word Spoken: Yeah. (to my mother)

Last Sleep: This morning.
Last IM: Kayleigh.

Last Sexual Fantasy: Crushes at school - 15 mins ago.
Last Weird Encounter: Hearing an explosion whilst listening to my Ipod, then finding out it was nothing.
Last Ice Cream Eaten: Monday - Maltesers Ice Cream.
Last Time Amused: Being questioned about my sexuality on the bus.
Last Time Wanting To Die: Never.

Last Time In Love: The most hated question, but being a 'direct person' (Michael Howard quote), I don't really know - I don't think I love anyone.
Last Time Hugged: 3.45pm today - at the Girls school.

Last Time Scolded: Hair straigteners a few days ago.
Last Time Resentful: Today - people talking about things they have no knowledge of.
Last Chair Sat In: 422 bus.

Last Underwear Worn: Black from the Underwear Company.

Last Shirt Worn: Dennis the Menace style - red and black.
Last Webpage Visited: www.bbc.co.uk/election2005

It's Election Day!!!! And I have never been surer of anything in my life than to vote for the Liberal Democrats! Yes, I was phased with all these Labour voters banging on about 'tactical voting', but to steal one good thing from Labour - if you value it, vote for it! And I value the abolition of student fees. I value a higher tax for the rich. I value 10,000 extra police. I value opposing the war on Iraq! - and I value becoming the future Liberal Democrat Prime Minister!

Current Mood: excited
Current Music: Mad World

1. What is your name? - Shaz.
2. What color underwear are you wearing now? - Black, how boring!
3. What are you listening to right now? If You're Gonna, Natasha Bedingfield.
4. What are the last 2 digits of your phone number? - 87
5. What was the last thing you ate? - Mini Eggs.
6. If you were a crayon what color would you be? - Red.
7. How is the weather right now? Sunny & Delightful, but I prefer the rain.
8. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? - My sister.
9. The first thing you notice about the opposite/same sex? - Clothes (honestly, that's not shallow)
10. Favorite Food? - Sushi.
11. Favorite Drinks? - Evian.
12. Favorite Alcoholic Drink? - Bacardi & Diet Coke.
13. Favorite place to shop - Topman.
14. Hair colour - Brown/Black
15. Eye Color: Hazel.
16. Do you wear contacts? - No
17. Top or Bottom? - Top.
18. Favorite Month? - December.
19. Favorite Fast Food? - McDonalds! Is there another? Really?
20. Last Movie you Watched? - Ginger Snaps.
21. Favorite Day of the Year? - Friday the 13th.
22. Are you too shy to ask someone out? - No.
23. Summer or Winter? - Winter (my winter wardrobe is better)
24. Hugs or Kisses? - Kisses.
25. Chocolate or Vanilla? - Vanilla.
26. Do you want your friends to respond back? - No.
27. Who is most likely to respond? - Screenage, no doubt!
28. Who is least likely to respond? - Me.
29. What books are you reading? - Strange Meeting, Susan Hill.
30. Favorite TV Show? - Desperate Housewives.
31. What's on your mouse pad? - Laptop, I'm afraid.
32. Favorite board game? - Monopoly.
33. What did you do last night? Went to see 'The History Boys' at the National Theatre.
34. Favorite Author? - Difficult question.
35. Who inspires you? - People who do wrong.
36. Butter, Plain or Salted popcorn? - Butter.
38. Favorite Flower? - Tulip.
39. What do you say when you wake up in the A.M.? - I need a pee, but I can't be arsed to get out of bed.
40. Do you still talk to your best friends from middle school? - No.
41. What's on your desk? - Don't make me do this again. Look at previous entries.
42. Rock Concert or symphony? - Rock Concert
43. Play or opera? - Play
44. Have you ever fired a gun? - Yes.
45. Do you like to travel by plane? - Yes.
46. Right-handed or Left-handed? - Left-Handed.
47. Smooth or Chunky Peanut Butter? - Smooth.
48. How many pillows do you sleep with? - 2.
49. Where were you born? - Greenwich, Connect....London.
50. Ever hitchhiked? No.

Dear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets
Cuz you’re the only one that I know who’ll keep
Them
Dear, dear diary, I want to tell my secrets
I know you’ll keep them, and this is what i’ve
Done...

Current Mood: mellow

'And try not to fall 'in love' this week—you might get hurt.'

- ah, the message from the Kabbalah centre this week. It seems that all of my horoscopes this week were deeply opposed to any such activity! I mean, another said 'You are under a lot of pressure this week, much of it social. DON'T FALL IN LOVE.' - hmm, is it just me, or is there a distinct message throughout the stars this week?

Well, anywho, I didn't plan, and don't plan to fall in love this week anyway (never plan things!) - but yes, much of my life has been social this week, rather than what I 'should' be doing which is studying. Ha.

So, I had a great day yesterday - I met up with Carl/Michelle (Michelle sounds better). We'd met at Heaven on New Years Eve, but he had a boyfriend at the time,so... Anywho, I think I liked him when I first saw him on that evening, but it was only since last Friday at Heaven that we started talking - a couple of hellos beforehand but that's it. Anyway, not to jinx the whole thing, because it is going well - we met up, had a great evening. End.

As for victory over addictions? Happiness is not totally dependant on an outside source. Never get too involved.

Current Mood: thoughtful

Your Seduction Style: The Coquette

You are a pro at playing the age old game of hard to get. Your flirting style runs hot and cold, giving just enough to keep them chasing you. Independent and self-sufficient, you don't need any one person to make you compelte. And that independence is exactly what makes people pursue you.

Current Mood: flirty
Current Music: Candy Shop

Current Mood: content

SHAZ: What are Kabbalah's thoughts on gossip.

Answer
Well of course it isn't a productive thing to gossip and usually people who are fulfilled and busy in their own lives have no time for it.

(...shit.)

1. Alarm clock.
2. Waterproof camera.
3. Ipod pink and black skins.
4. Saturday by Ian McEwan.
5. Sound effects CDs.
6. Gisela May CD.
7. Kabbalah books.
8. Kabbalah red string.
9. Sellotape.
10. A hole-punch.
11. Pens.
12. Mystic orb.
13. A pocket Zohar pinchas.
14. A replica Oscar.
15. A wristband saying 'BITCH.'
16. A black and yellow bracelet from Jordan.
17. A TV.
18. Strawberry Lipsyl.
19. Vaseline
20. Vaseline Intensive Care Hand Cream.
21. Gucci wallet.
22. My phone.
23. Vitamin C, Multivitamins and Fish Oil tablets.
24. Green Mini-Ipod.
25. CD Player.
26. Keys.
27. Microphone.
28. Pugsey bear
29. A driving test leaflet.
30. Water

Current Mood: worried

O Ego! Hear my flawless numbers, wrung
By overdone applause and hoots galore,
And pardon that my talent should be dung,
Oh how I deserve that soft-conche'd roar
Naturally you dream of me today,
Thy wing'ed Ego with thy smouldered eye?
I minced into LV without delay,
And, to my delight, dying with surprise,
Saw two jewelled diamonds, couche'd side by side,
In foulest mast, beneath the whispering sighs,
Of queens and sagging bosoms, where there ran
A doubter, scarce to hide,
Awakened, delighted, and fragrant eyed,
O Ego! Hear my flawed numbers sung!

They stood abade on the rotten carpet,
Their arms crossed, and their mint coats too,
Their faces cracked not too, but here came the boo.
As if joine'd by crowne'd Elizabeths,
But still yet felt not I the pain of Macbeth,
At tender eye of aurorean hate,
The flawless boy I knew,
But who wast I, O wicked, wicked bait?
My Ego adieu!